As the Mother of Sons, I know a lot is expected of them. As the Mother of Sons of Color, I know that they will have to do even more than their White counterparts to succeed in life. My job as their mother, is to teach them all I can and share my life experiences with them, in hopes that they will learn from them and make smart decisions.
When it comes to girls and relationships, I’m very protective of my boys. I don’t want girls taking advantage of my boys. At the same time, I don’t want my sons taking advantage of girls either, it goes both ways.
I try to teach by example, instead of preaching to them. I try to model behaviors that I’d like them to seek out in a girl/woman. I carry myself a certain way, with dignity. I don’t curse, I’ve just never liked hearing females cursing like sailors… it just isn’t ladylike, imo.
My children have never seen me drunk, because I don’t drink. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with drinking responsibly, but for me, alcohol just isn’t my thing. My kids know you can have fun without drinking. Whether they will continue in my footsteps and refrain from alcohol, I don’t know. I just hope they steer clear of the ‘party girls’.
I’m not materialistic. Sure I like nice things, but I’m not breaking the bank to get all the latest fashion trends or jewels or whatever may be hot at the moment. I’ve shown my boys how to live frugally and save your money.
I don’t ‘run the streets’- I think this one goes without saying. I’ve never been one to hang out at the bars (why would I if I don’t drink?), or party every weekend. I don’t use drugs, not even recreationally. I have morals and pretty high standards.
I treat others as I’d like to be treated. I’m respectful to everyone I meet. I’m polite, I still say ‘please’ & ‘thank you’. I’m honest, sometimes to a fault. I’m fiercely loyal and will have your back to the very end.
Anytime I see or hear my oldest doing or saying something questionable, I call him out on it… even if he’s just joking around. I want him to know, without a shadow of a doubt, what is right & what is wrong. He knows that girls are to be respected, period!
As Mothers, we are the first (and probably the most important) example to our sons of what a woman should be. I hope that by doing so, my sons will be choosy about the girls they let into their lives. My sons are treasures and this Momma doesn’t want their hearts to be broken.
* We are mothers. We are mothers of sons. We are the mothers of sons of color. We are their voices. Let’s share, encourage and support one another. Voices For Our Sons #VFOS Join our next twitter chat!
You can connect with all of us on our blogs:
- Children of The Old School
- And Starring As Herself
- Mama Harris’ Kitchen
- Divas With A Purpose
- Janeane’s World
